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Pregnancy is one of the most exciting phases in a couple’s life. It is filled with the anticipation of embarking upon a new journey with your partner and welcoming a cute little family member to the world.

Pregnancy is also one of the toughest phases of a woman’s life. From constant backaches to frequent bathroom runs, morning sickness, and nausea to crazy hormones. The mum needs all the love and support she can get during this time, and dads can be more involved than just accompanying her for the gynaecologist appointments. Here are some simple yet effective ways in which dads can ace the supporting role and make pregnancy a happy and enjoyable experience for the mum.

1. Be involved

Whether it is tracking the growth of your baby, keeping a hospital bag ready or taking a birthing class, be involved in the entire process. Of course, it all begins with visiting the doctor together and helping track the overall health parameters of your partner. Participate in everything, no matter how big or small. Experiencing the excitement of this time together will bring you both closer. Even if it is the most obvious thing for you, don’t forget to intermittently remind her that she is not alone in this. You are right there with her. Don’t just tell her, show her.

2. Be her cheerleader

Support your partner by making important lifestyle changes with her. Share her decaf, eat salads with her, give up alcohol, don’t smoke. Keep some positive reaffirmations handy for when she seems down or doubtful. Show confidence in her ability to be a great mother to your child(ren). Basically, make sure to always sound optimistic and encouraging. When an expectant mother is happy and stress free, it has positive effects on the baby growing inside her as well.

3. Make time for each other

In the whirlwind of pregnancy, prenatal classes, and appointments with the gynaecologist, naturally, the sole focus is on the baby. It is easy to lose sight of each other. You can prevent this by making sure that both of you make some time for each other. Little things like having meals together, going out on walks or for a quick coffee, or bringing back date nights can help you spend quality time with each other before the baby arrives.

4. Indulge her food cravings

During pregnancy, the woman’s body goes through a lot of hormonal fluctuation. In the process, your expecting wife might experience weird food cravings, very often at odd times. Indulge her cravings. Get her that tub of ice cream at 2 am and eat it with her! Or maybe just keep a few things she has suddenly started liking handy. Not just cravings, she might also experience aversion to her favourite food while pregnant. Remember, she isn’t doing it on purpose, and respect the aversions.

5. Get ready for some serious mood swings

The fluctuating pregnancy hormones can cause extreme mood swings resulting in bouts of frustration, anger, sadness, and even a few tears here and there. Help her manage these emotions in ways that work for her. Give her solutions when she asks for them or simply comfort her through everything she’s experiencing emotionally. Sometimes, all it takes is giving her rants (even the illogical ones) a patient hearing while at others some pampering or cuddles can do the trick.

6. Remember, her body is changing

As her body creates and nurtures new life, it will also grow to accommodate the growing baby. She is bound to get conscious about her appearance and start getting body image issues. Refrain from making jokes about it. (It is a good idea to never comment on her weight or appearance, except to tell her she is beautiful!) Be her pillar during the time of such vulnerability. Let her know that she is loved and appreciated irrespective of the weight gain.

7. Help her with stress and anxiety

Mothers-to-be have a lot on their plates. Is my baby healthy? Will I be a good mother? What if labour is too painful? Will I have a normal birth or a C-section? All these feelings of stress and anxiety are completely normal and very real. Instead of dismissing her emotions, hear her out and acknowledge them. Comfort her with facts and information where possible or simply be her soundboard if that’s what she needs.  

8. Let her rest

Expect your expecting wife to feel constantly tired. This is especially true towards the end of the pregnancy, even more so if you already have children to look after. Let her rest as much as she can. Find a babysitter for your elder child or get the grandparents involved. Take over the household chores or get hired help. Plan weekly meals and prep for them over the weekend. Do the dishes, fold the laundry – help her out as much as you can. Another great way to help with this is to offer her back or foot rubs to ease the constant pain.

9. Experience the excitement together

From holding the first sonogram in your hand to feeling the first little kicks of the baby and agreeing upon a name. Setting up the nursery, shopping for the kiddo, and baby-proofing the house – these seemingly mundane tasks will one day become the fondest memories for the two of you. There are so many moments in this nine-month period that would become extra special for your partner, just because you were present to share them with her.

10. Make her feel special

Even though the baby stuff is constant and all-consuming at this time, find time to do the non-baby things too. Binge on your favourite shows together or plan an impromptu trip and take her by surprise. Do everything you can to make her feel loved and pampered to make this the most memorable time of her life!

Having a child is a momentous event. Life, as you know it, will change. Your equation with your spouse as a partner will transform into one as a co-parent. Your involvement in ensuring your partner is a happy mom-to-be would also give her a sneak peek into what kind of father you would be. Make sure that your actions are a constant source of reassurance that you would be a good partner to take this long and arduous journey with.